Me: You don't really do subtle flirting, do you? You are pointing and singing the Mission Impossible Theme Song.
Becky: Yeah...not so much.
Always Trying To Be Helpful
Roomie: What should I wear out?
Me: A big giant bag of poop.
Me: Where did you grow up?
Cute Boy: Nigeria.
Me: Do you know that prince that owes me money?
Does my underlying fear of commitment attract me to men that won’t commit?
12 Things That The Mainstream Media Is Being... →
8bitian: mollierosie: cliffordcorrupt: ‘As the mainstream media continues to be obsessed with Anthony Weiner and his bizarre adventures on Twitter, much more serious events are happening around the world that are getting very little attention. In America today, if the mainstream media does not cover something it is almost as if it never happened. Right now, the worst nuclear disaster...
My birthday last year...
Last year on my birthday, my boyfriend (at the time) called me at 10 a.m. as I was walking to meet him for a Cubs game to tell me that he was going to take me “to every bar on the Clark St. Wrigleyville strip.” My response: “All I’ve eaten today is a peach…” You can probably guess how that turned out. We had an amazing day, met a bunch of his friends, saw...
Ever have a case of BSB mania? →
Go to Wikipedia and click “random article.” This...
pberntsen: evangotlib: onemoretimewithfeeling: percepto: kittykittybangbang: littleorphanammo: lottiebites Law & Order: Special Victims Unit (season 6) Victory Disease. VICTORY DISEASE. Methods of Silence USS Hilary P. Jones (DD-427) No comment. I normally wouldn’t share such private information, but A Million in Prizes. :) HOLY SHIT - technology is amazing…how does...
There is always one person you love who becomes that definition. It usually...– Chuck Klosterman (via aeloquence) GIANT F(BOMB)
Friends Don't Let Friends...
Roommate: What are you doing in there?
Me: Drinking and texting.
Roommate: That sounds like a terrible idea.
Wanna come day drink with me? →
So...This exists... →
Someone has now coined the term Fernattics…about me…Ana Fernatt.
Is it a Full Moon?!?!?– Me to my niece…after I had been petting the wet dog…which ended in my entire palm being covered in hair.
Mom: I've got clothes in the dryer.
Me: I've got chills...they're multiplyin'.
Mom: ::Big Sigh::
#GoodDick is trending nationally on Twitter right now… LADIES, WE CAN DO BETTER!!!!! Get it together.
I hope to have a summer fling as hot and filthy as this weather.
Is side boob the best kind of boob?
The Liquid Burning of Apocalyptic Bard Letters →
This is a liiiiiiiittle out of my element and not the type of writing/performance typical to “Accidentally Sexy”…When you get asked by a group of smart, interesting people to participate in their monthly performance, you just do it! I’m referring to it as the Accidentally Sexy Collector’s Edition. I’ve still put my little AS spin on this Apocalypse theme, but...
Showing Off The Ta-tas.
This weekend is my niece’s 10th birthday and I’m taking the MegaBus (we’ll see how this goes…) home to surprise her. I just called my sister to talk through some ideas on what to get her for her double-digit b-day. When I was 10, I would’ve been SO PUMPED for some Bonne Bell Lip Smackers and a Bop Magazine. Literally, if you had given me a choice between a Porsche...
Life is beautiful like that. When you let life live through you, you get guided...– Jenn Green, the one and only. Looking through old e-mails moments ago, I came across a particularly emotional one. I was about to write something cryptic and probably pretty angsty…but then I saw this. Sometimes life sends you the most beautiful reminders. Sometimes just the flap of a...
: Love your job or don't have one. →
CHURCH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I was recently listening to a Love + Radio podcast (phenomenal show out of Chicago, p.s.) where they were interviewing an artist about a show she does related to money. At one point, she’s talking about how the work she does isn’t anything specific to her. We all go through the basic shiz of human existence. She’s describing some of...
Let’s stay together till we’re ghosts. I want to witness love, but...– Drake
Your life is like a kid’s essay of “how I want to spend my summer...– Connie, aka Marathon Missfit
It’s that time of day when I play “WHAT THE F AM I GOING TO WEAR TODAY?!?!?!?”
All of my problems could be fixed right now with...
I wish Tumblr had existed when I was 14. I would have been ALL OVER this stuff....
This just happened
Boy: Come out to JBar tonight!
Me: I can't tonight.
Me: My allergies are really bad.
Inner Ana: WTF did you just say to this guy?!?
Him: Did I just hear you say you are not coming to Superfun because you have allergies?
Me: No...no...you totally misheard me. Uhm...I'm in Spain?
Someone found my Tumblr by Googling “Taylor Hanson Pants”. FartWithTheHeadphonesOn, this is completely your fault. <3
The best way to behave is to misbehave.– Mae West (my house Godess)